Monday, April 20, 2009 - Scribbles

Will you listen to my story?
It’ll just be a minute.
How can I explain?
Whatever happened here, never meant to hurt you.
How can I cause you so much pain?

“Hermione, please, just let me explain.”

“Why, Draco? Why did you do it – no, how could you do it?! I thought,” Hermione faltered, “I thought you loved me.”

Draco saw the tears forming and forced himself to look back across the lake. He never meant to hurt her; everything he had done was for her safety. Didn’t she understand that? “Of course I love you, Hermione. That’s why I had to do it. If I hadn’t, Merlin only knows what they would have done to you. As it is, they’ve only left you alone because they think I’m using you to get to Potter.”

“What are you talking about? No one even knows about us because of your father!”

“Somehow the Death Eaters found out,” Draco said simply.

Hermione was visibly shaken by the revelation that the Death Eaters knew about her relationship with her former enemy. She started stuttering, “Bu – but – but that’s – that’s not -”

“It is. Somehow, it is possible, and when I find out who’s responsible, they will pay.”

When I say I’m sorry,
Will you believe me?
Listen to my story,
Say you won’t leave me.
When I say I’m sorry,
Can you forgive me?
When I say I will always be there,
Will you believe?
Will you believe in me?

“Hermione, I’m sorry. I know that it’s not enough, but I am sorry. The Dark Lord -”

“You mean Voldemort, the half-blood,” Hermione snapped.

Draco shuddered at the use of the name. “Hermione, please, don’t say that name.”

“Why not? He branded you, surely that means you can use the name he chose for himself!”

“That’s not how it works, and just because he branded me, as you put it, doesn’t mean that I’m on his side. I only took the Mark to keep you safe! Can’t you forgive me for that?”

“And just how does that keep me safe? The way I see it, I’m in more danger now than I was before.”

“What do you mean,” Draco questioned, suddenly more worried than ever that she would leave him.

All the words that I come up with,
They’re like gasoline on flames.
There’s no excuse, no explanation.
Believe me if I could undo what I did wrong,
I’d give away all that I own.

“Voldemort now has a direct link straight to you and, most likely, your thoughts considering how powerful he is. If I’m with you, he’ll know exactly what’s going on and that you aren’t using me. Then he’ll kill you and come after me, anyway, right?”

“Er . . .” Draco looked a bit confused.

“However,” Hermione continued, “if that’s not a worry, then that means that you’re lying to me about everything and I’m no safer with you than I would be alone with Voldemort. So tell me, exactly how is it that am I safer?”

“Because, um, distance matters with certain powers. Plus, Hogwarts has shields and protections set up against those sorts of spells and enchantments, right?”

“You can’t honestly expect me to believe that?! Do you even believe that? Don’t you remember that Voldemort was able to see into Harry’s mind while he was here and being closely watched by Dumbledore in addition to Hogwarts’ protections. You willingly let him brand you which means you willingly gave him access your thoughts. The school’s protections aren’t going to block something that was allowed!”

“That can’t be right. I wouldn’t have done it if I had known -”

“Just – stop talking, Draco. Just stop. I don’t want to hear it anymore,” Hermione half sobbed, half yelled before running back towards the castle.

When I say I’m sorry,
Will you believe me?
Listen to my story,
Say you won’t leave me.
When I say I’m sorry,
Can you forgive me?
When I say I will always be there,
Will you believe?
Will you believe in me?

“Hermione,” Draco yelled, while chasing after her, “you have to listen to me! You have to believe me!”

“Just leave me alone, please, just leave me alone,” Hermione sobbed.

Draco had caught up to her and grabbed her arms to stop her from running again. “Hermione, you have to believe me. I thought I was keeping you safe. I thought I was doing the right thing. Please,” he cried, “don’t leave me.”

Hermione kept her eyes on the ground while shaking and crying, not realizing that she was literally breaking his heart into pieces.

If I told you I’ve been cleanin’ my soul,
And if I promise you I’ll regain control,
Will you open your door,
And let me in, take me for who I am?
And not for who I’ve been, who I’ve been.

“Look at me, Hermione,” he begged as he tilted her face up to meet her eyes, “I love you. I wouldn’t have done this if I had known that it was going to make things worse. Please, come with me. We’ll go to Dumbledore and ask him to help. He’ll know what to do. Please, I promise I’ll fix this, just give me a chance.”

“You – you mean it?” Hermione asked hopefully. “You’ll really ask Professor Dumbledore for help?”

“If you’ll go with me.”

“But, why?”

“I’ve told you why, Hermione. I love you. I may have made a really horrible mistake, but I do love you. And I’m willing to try my hardest to fix that mistake. For you.”

“Draco, you can’t do it for me. You have to do it for yourself.”

“Then, I’ll do it for us. I’m trying to change, Hermione, and it’s because of you. I want to be a better person because of you, but I’m not perfect. I’ll keep making mistakes, I just hope none will be as awful as this one is, but you have to help me, Hermione. Please,” he begged again while thinking, “my father would kill me himself if he saw me begging.

When I say I’m sorry,
Will you believe me?
Listen to my story,
Say you won’t leave me.
When I say I’m sorry,
Can you forgive me?
When I say I will always be there,
Will you believe?
Will you believe in me?

“Okay, Draco, let’s go find Professor Dumbledore and see what he can do,” Hermione finally consented.

“You mean, you believe me?”

“I don’t know,” she said, her voice quavering. “I want to, but it’s hard. You’ve lied so many times in the past and I’ve always forgiven you, but this is really big, Draco. Right now, I’m willing to try and help you, especially since you’re willing to go to Professor Dumbledore. At the very least, if you are lying, he’ll know what you are ahead of time.”

“Hermione, I swear to you, I’m not lying. I know that I have in the past, but I would never lie about something like this.”

She turned back towards the castle and muttered, “Let’s just find Professor Dumbledore for now and we’ll decide the rest of this later.”

“Hermione, I hope you can believe me one day because I only meant the best. I love you. I always will. And regardless of what you decide, I hope you know that I am truly sorry for doing something so stupid. I really did think it would help.” Draco was still pleading with her when they arrived at the entrance of Professor Dumbledore’s office. He stopped her before she said the password to open the entrance. “Hermione, I have to know, do you believe me?”

Hermione opened her mouth, but she didn’t know what to say. Draco looked at her hopefully, expectantly, but, before he could ask again, Professor Dumbledore stepped out from his office and, with a twinkle in his eye, asked, “Is there something I can help you two with?”

“Yes, Professor, Draco has a problem that he would like your advice on,” Hermione answered in a rush. “Well, I’ll just be going back to my dorm now. Good luck, Draco.”

“Hermione, wait . . . I thought you were going to stay with me for this?”

His eyes were pleading with her to stay, but she didn’t know if she could, or even if she should. “Draco, I can’t right now. I need some time to think about this. About us. Just – I’ll find you when I’m ready.” Hermione turned and walked away, leaving behind a stricken boy and a curious Professor.

“Well, Mister Malfoy, shall we,” Professor Dumbledore asked gently one Hermione was out of sight.

“Yes, sir,” Draco answered sullenly while glancing back down the hall hoping to see Hermione running back to him.

When I say I’m sorry,
When I say I’m sorry,
When I say I’m sorry,
When I say I’m sorry,
When I say I’m sorry,
Can you forgive me?
When I say I will always be there,
Will you believe me?

After Draco had finished speaking, Professor Dumbledor said, “Mister Malfoy, the Order and I can help you, but there are certain sacrifices that you have to be willing to make.”

“Sacrifices?” Draco questioned suspiciously.

“Yes, sacrifices. For starters, we will have to remove the Dark Mark, which is extremely painful and -”

“The Dark Mark can’t be removed. It’s permanent,” Draco interupted.

“I assure you, Mister Malfoy, nothing is permanent in this world, especially not the Dark Mark. Now as I was saying, first, you will have to remove the Dark Mark. Second, you will have to tell me everything you know about Voldemort and the Death Eaters. And lastly, you will have to go into hiding which would mean cutting all ties with everyone. Do you understand what switching sides entails, Mister Malfoy?”

“Yes, sir, and I’m ready for it,” Draco stated calmly. “Headmaster, I would like you to give me the Veritaserum potion so that there are no doubts about my sincerity.”

“Very well, Mister Malfoy.”

Three hours later, Draco had told Professor Dumbledore everything he knew, everything he suspected, and what had been expected of him. Professor Dumbledore had made copies of several of Draco’s memories and stored them in one of the bottles near his pensieve. Then Professor Dumbledore asked him about going into hiding.

“Once the Dark Mark is removed, you will have to go into hiding immediately, Mister Malfoy. Is there anything you would like to take care of before we remove the Dark Mark?”

“Yes,” spoke a voice from the doorway.

Both men turned towards the door to see Hermione close to tears and looking at Draco while repeating, “Yes, Draco, I believe you. Professor Dumbledore, if Draco is going into hiding then I want to go with him.”

“Hermione, what are you doing here?” Draco asked with a stunned look on his face while slowly rising from his chair and walking over to Hermione.

“I told you that I would find you when I was ready, Draco,” she replied while lovingly placing a hand on his cheek. “I’m sorry that I left you to do this alone, but I was scared, and hurt, and . . . and I wasn’t sure if I believed you. But I love you. And I know that you love me. That’s all that matters.”

“Miss Granger, I’m sure that you have thought of the problems that going into hiding can cause, especially when hiding more than one person in the same place.”

“Yes, Headmaster, but I believe that Draco and I are both capable enough to balance out those problems. I also know that I won’t be separated from him regardless of our capabilities.”

“Hermione, I love you, but you don’t have to do this,” Draco said quietly.

“I know, Draco. I’m not doing this because I have to. I’m doing this because I want to. And I want to because of how much I love you. You’re not going anywhere without me!”

Draco looked at the beautiful witch he had wrapped in his arms and, for the first time ever, felt that everything was going to be fine. She tipped her head to the side slightly as he leaned down and gave her a gentle, chaste kiss before turning to Professor Dumbledore and saying, “I think we’re ready, sir. I know I am.”

A little information:

First and foremost, I own neither the Harry Potter series or any of the characters.  Second, the song is called “Sorry” and I don’t own it, either.  Those are the respective properties of J.K. Rowling and Daughtry.

I posted this story on FanFiction.Net on August 19, 2007.  When I copied it over, I corrected some minor mistakes that I had made, but other than that, I haven’t changed a thing.

Occasionally Important Information:

Once upon a nightmare . . .
The Boyfriend Poem

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